Spurious News: The "real reason" the Reflecting Pool paint job isn't finished: "The stencil's not here"

[jmowreader]

WASHINGTON (Spurious News Network) -- The Reflecting Pool is one of our nation's most beloved landmarks. It is a rectangular pool 2030 feet long by 167 feet wide located between the Lincoln Memorial and the Washington Monument on the National Mall. Its stunning views have drawn tens of millions of visitors per year since the pool was constructed over a century ago.

In honor of America's 250th birthday King Donald Trump directed Atlantic Industrial Coatings, a Virginia-based painting contractor Trump previously employed to work on swimming pools at his resorts then denied ever having heard of before after the media started asking how a $1.8 million job other industrial coating companies claim can't be done that cheap became a $13.1 million job which other companies claim is way too high, to paint the Reflecting Pool in a shade of blue Trump has used on several of his own projects. The project was supposed to be completed by Independence Day, but Atlantic Industrial Coatings now says it will not be.

Today the firm explained why the job won't be done on time.

"The stencil isn't here."

Unbeknownst to the Architect of the Capital, the Trump administration ordered from a Chinese sign company, as part of the project, a 2000-foot-long, 150-foot-high stencil of Trump's last name which will be painted in white on the bottom of the pool.

Administration officials defended the decision to outsource the creation of the stencil to a Chinese firm. According to Karoline Leavitt, White House Press Secretary, "President Trump ordered the stencil from China because no company in the United States can make anything like that."

This assertion was quickly refuted by a company in the United States. James Rozier, operations manager for Military Wraps Defense Systems, a Lumberton, NC, corporation that specializes in work for the United States Departments of Defense and Justice, said, "There are a lot of sign shops in the United States that have the equipment to make that stencil. We could have made it in a month of 24-hour days if we'd been hired to do it. No American sign shop would do it because of Trump's track record when it comes to paying vendors - you'd have about $200,000 just into materials and Trump has told way too many companies 'I'm not paying this' when the bill arrives. I would have lost my home on this job, and I like my home. Also, there doesn't need to be a name at the bottom of the Reflecting Pool, and everyone would reject the job for that too."

[eppur_se_muova]

1. Jeez, now that the idea has been brought up ... maybe he'll ... nt

[tanyev]

2. Yep, I'm surprised he didn't demand a golden mosaic of himself for the pool floor.